Can somebody tell me?? God, will u tell me? Friends, can u guys tell me? Teachers, can u tell me? I bet u're wondering why am I not asking my parents. Nah, not that close to them. Btw, I dun really want to involve them in this particular matter, coz they dont know me well. I mean, I rarely share things with them, so they most probably wont know. Haha. Okay, here comes the prob. There are so many probs that i'm facing now. Or should I say dilemma. After my SPM, I have gone through the darkest moment in my life. The fear n insecure feeling bout my future. When SPM ended, I was lost! I didnt have a goal that time. I was so scared. I didnt like sitting round my home doing nothing. But then I have found a new goal, but my friends might not believe me. It's a game, namely Tetris Battle. Okay, so I played it and played n played again. That time, I was just thinking to be the best in that game. So,I kept thinking of being ranked up to rank 100. (And PLEASE, DON'T LAUGH) U know why, I played the game like thousands of times. More than 4000 matches that I have played to this day! And u know what, I am currenty in rank 24.HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA. There was one moment that I thought; F**k this SHIT!! I'm not gonna play this anymore and I was so fed up wif that game. U know it sucks when a 'straight' person like me, a.k.a dumb have to plan a game strategy to knock off the opponent. And it wasnt easy. But , miraculously, Im still playing till today, just now. And there is one boy,named Kelvin. Helo Mr. Kelvin, stop looking at me as ur rival. Believe me, I have no skills at all. Why are u keep looking for me in the match?When I was in the game, u were there oso. And another 2 girls, Miss Yong Le n Miss Evelyne. Can u guys tell me ur secrets to be ranked up from rank 20++ to rank 50++??? OMG!! U guys are so skillful! And finally this guy; I met him in Draw My Thing, Mr, MJ. How am I supposed to say this ??? Hurm,,, he played 700++ games and won 521 of them. And he was God of Tetris!! Dafuq???! then he invited me for a battle in the game. And u know what, he said he was a tetris noob. But I have never a seen a tetris noob performing T-spins, and he performed 2,I think so, in the beginning of the game! As u guys have guessed, I lost the game for sure. haha...You're a good player, MJ... hehe...If u have ever seen this, be grateful because I rarely praise people, unless they're very extraordinary.. :) You know what, I have learnt something from this game and discovered the dilemma I'm facing now. Should I just give up or continue to fight for something that I most probably won't achieve?Should I just lower my demand and continue with a stress-free life; a happy life and be an average person?? Or should I continue to put effort that wont even change my life, even a little? TETRIS BATTLE, u teach me this. I admit that I'm not not born with a mind good in strategy-planning and I often misplace the tetriminos. I dunno, I have played u so many times, and I just can't break the lines and KO's records. I have seen the others' records, some even played 40000++ times. And they finally became God of Tetris. I keep persuading myself to play u .
'YU KE, U JUST PLAYED IT FOR MORE THAN 4000 TIMES, HOW ABOUT THOSE WHO HAVE PLAYED IT 40000++ TIMES?? THEY NEVER GIVE UP, AND FINALLY THEY REACHED THEIR GOAL. '
Actually, I met with the same dilemma in my life when I realized I won't be the best forever. Maybe I was the top student for SPM in my sch, but there are so many excellent students out there. Brilliant, genius, extraordinary, talented, gifted students with good IQ. SO, how I am going to compete with them when I dun even have the capabilities? You know, becoming an average person is a piece of cake, u dun have to do anything. Cikgu Nooredah once asked; Bagaimana anda nak tanam lalang di atas sebidang tanah yg diberikan kpd anda?Jawapannya, anda tak perlu buat apa2. Mcm hidup ni gak, if u wanna be an average person, then do nothing, u can lead a happier life. But , u 'll never experience the joyness of sucess. that sweet moment when everybody are inspired by u.Then, u'll see everything running smoothly. To all the f5 students, u guys are so much better than our batch last year. You guys have done a great job making STARP proud.I know u guys are feeling at the top now, just like I did last year. I'm sorry to say this but one day , u guys will realize that u're not the best forever.Maybe the ways of us handling failure are differnt. I am jealous with u guys , coz u guys are more outstanding than us , both in ur studies n also co-curricular xtvts. I wan to share this wif somebodywho is a good listener. But, nevermind, they apparently not interested to listen to my prob. I'll seek the solution myself then.
Finally, I realized another thing, sometimes when people wrote something with emoticons, they're not dramatic. Maybe they just wanna hide their real feelings.
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